The Land of Buddha

Tawang is very well known for its Gompas and having had the fortune of living and travelling with a Buddhist couple over the few days I spent there gave me a first person insight into many of their believes, practices and faith. The study of the religion from the eye of a local practioner gave interesting glimpses- an understanding vastly different from reading books and a quest to know more.

The huge golden Buddha statue of Tawang Monastery has represented Tawang for a long time. This monastery also houses a museum which has artifacts of dress, jewelry, musical instruments and utensils used in the past. It also features the escape route of Dalai Lama from Tibet into India and also other dignitaries like Nehru, Indira, Rajiv and Sonia who had visited the monastery while in office.

Golden Buddha @ Tawang Monastery

Tawang Monastery or Gompa also houses the homes of the lamas and their school where they study culture, religion and Languages. Lama are buddist brahmacharis i.e men who have owed celibacy for life. I learnt from a local Buddhist that when a Buddhist family has three male children, they are to enroll their second male child as a lama. In that part of the world where having 3-4 children is still the norm, I suppose most Buddhist homes may have a lama.

These rules do not apply to the girl child and the women lama’s or ani have been enrolled purely voluntarily or due to family circumstances. These children join the residential lama schools at a very early age of 5 and stay there for rest of their lives. I was told that the children who study in these schools come from as far as down south Kerala and numerous other states all over India. Gompas or monasteries are separate for the men and women and the Gompas for women are called the Ani Gompas.

Wall Paintings in a Monastery

Tawang has two beautiful Ani Gompas just a little away from the Tawang Monastery which is a gompa for the men. We also visited another Gompa in the Khimney Village which is mens Gompa as well but a different and a slightly more moderate thoughts. While the lamas in tawang monastery can never walk out of their chosen path of celibacy, the lamas here are allowed to pay some penalty to compensate for the expenses undertaken by the gompa in their upbringing to give up their lama hood and get married.

But it is widely believed to be an act of sin that will be punishable in the court of God. Every Gompa has a painting of satan or devil like person around whom the various sins and punishments for the same are represented in the paintings. It also talks about how the good reach heaven and then how we are made to suffer for our misdeeds. The punishments like putting inside a boiling oil pan, hanging a person upside down etc, reminded me of same/similar punishments that are captured in the garuda puram of the hindus. 

I was told if I can touch the two big toes of the devil at the same time with both my hands would mean that I do not have any sins in my name. The Tawang monastery also had a huge pillar in the open, much like a structure in the hindu temples. I was told if I can touch/hold both my hands around the structure then I have done not any sins. Another test was if I can place a coin on top of the Golden Buddha head in one of his curls, I can prove my innocence. I ofcourse failed all the three tests and concluded that to be of no sin in buddhism, I must get bigger arms and a better aim.

There were many striking similarities between Hinduism and Buddhism, with deities having the third eye like siva and even a god with elephant face like Ganesha. I later understood that Mahayana Buddhism, the one that is followed in Tawang recognized the three big gods of Hinduism, Brahma, Vishnu and Siva with the duties of creation, protections and destruction but they did not have a deity like status however Ganesha, god with the elephant head has a deity status and is considered as a deity who removed obstacles which is the same as what Hindus consider him as well. The other form of Buddhism called Hinayana does not recognise any Gods including the Buddha.

We also visited another gompa (monastery) on our way back from Madhiri Lake which was constructed by someone in the memory of his mother. I was told that the rocks there are holy and each one has a story which is given in the scriptures and as they did not have that book in hand, they are unable to narrate it to me. But we did take some delicious cucumbers that were left as offering for the rocks. The offerings in Gompa was another thing that left me stunned. Because it had not just fruits, flowers but also candies, vanspati, oil, vegetables, flour etc. I remembered that some big Gompas in Singapore had even fresh meat as offering. I was told that recently it had been declared by the local monastery issued a doctrine banning eating of meat and declared it as anti- religious and so our hosts who had been eating ducks, chicken, mutton and beef had turned vegetarians. It was really surprising to me that people could change their food habits over night because their place of worship said so or so was their belief. Even for a staunch vegetarian by birth and choice like me, it sounded a little overwhelming because I have been battling for a long time to give up on coffee and I keep losing the will to lose the habit.

My host with our Loot - the two cucmbers

My hosts also taught me their chant ‘Oh mane padme hum” which is supposed to bring good luck. Buddhists do a lot of things to bring good luck for them including hanging of the colorful flags with a prayer, in their homes, vehicles, in mountain pass, valleys, roads, gompas, odd places on top of the mountains and I even saw them in gurudwara and the cave used by Guru nanak when he was in Mechuka. It would be impossible to miss these colorful strip of flags in any Himalayan mountain at least in this part of the world. All these flags despite the difference in the color, size, and texture had the same prayer, pictures and inscription in it. There are also strips of white flags in these places which had a different prayer and we were told that these white flags are tied in the memory of the departed ones.

Another queer thing I felt was that, my hosts who were only in their late forties and early fifties spoke about their own death without much ado about it. It appeared to me strange, for it is always considered a taboo topic from where I come from and the only people who talk about their own deaths are atleast past their seventies. Maybe it is an understanding from the Buddhism or was typical for this couple or may be that life expectancy in that region is way too low. I can’t say for sure but they did seem very comfortable about the idea of their own deaths.

Travelling as a traveller does teach you a lot and I have been a very keen student. These are my observations and understanding from what I saw, heard and read from my hosts and a wee bit from the internet. If you had things to agree, disagree or found it interesting and enlightening, please leave a comment. I am eager to know and learn from you.

The Decent Proposals

A young, solo and single women (that too a pretty woman) traveler encounters many interesting experiences, even in India. I’ve had quite a few of them and some of them lead to indirect and sometimes even direct proposals. Since I’m giving up my single status soon…I thought it would be appropriate to recount some of these interesting proposals.

Cycling in the himalayas

It was in Himachal in April 2012, where I was riding my cycle up the ghat roads of himachal towards Jalori pass and one of those many moments to catch a breath and also to catch that breath taking moment, I stopped by. Put the cycle against the mountain face and settled down sipping water, and looking at the picturesque scene around me. A local himachali old guy soon joined me, intrigued by my attire with knee pads, helmets and mountain cycle, he started inquiring about me things like, where I was from, what I was doing there, what I do for living, what my next destinations is. He seemed a friendly person and I didn’t have a problem answering any of these questions. Suddenly, questions got a little more personal like, what my age is, and if I was single or married and why I wasn’t married yet etc... What followed next was what totally threw me out of my wits, he asked me if I would like to meet his son, and if we both like each other we can get married in a temple near where we were sitting. He went on to explain that they owned a house and some land, with the intention to lure me into his offer. I later came to know that it is not possible for the outsiders to buy property in himachal and so his owning land and property was indeed a big deal!! He definitely seemed like he might call and ask his son to come over right then!!! I quickly excused myself from the place saying that my camp leader would be looking for me and I have to leave right away. He tried to catch up with me for a while and then let me go, with an invite to tea at his home on the way back.

Relaxing at the basecamp

Same year 2012 in the month of October, I was doing my Basic Mountaineering Course with the Himalayan Mountaineering Institute. After all the sunburn, unkempt and uncombed hair, and not having taken a shower or deo or having not seen my face in a mirror for more than 20 days, I found myself alone in Bakhim. Other mountaineers had either not arrived or busy washing clothes or taking a nap. I found a corner to lie back on the rock and look out at the magnificent Kanchenjunga range. It was a perfectly blissful state, and I was enjoying my moment of solitude, when the nepali cook showed up asking me, why I was sitting alone. I realized he was in mood of a conversation. I was unwilling to rudely send him away as I felt really grateful for the wonderful job the cooks had done in feeding us for the last 25 days or so, I sat up to talk. We discussed the Himalayas, nepali sherpas, their profession. Somehow the topic suddenly took a turn on how I would manage to sustain my love for the mountains post wedding, and he  suggested I must marry a Nepali and asked if my parents would be okay with that. He went around trying to sell his case by saying how good they are with the mountains, and if I had still not got the message, he left before saying that he is unmarried too and looking for someone. I subtly wished him good luck.

The love of the mountains got a fellow mountaineer and Bengali doctor from my rope to make an attempt as well. He boldly and openly declared to everyone that ‘Priya will marry only someone who loves the mountains as much as she does… and he went about talking how he though a doctor willingly sacrifices his practice for his love for the mountains !! ‘The messaging got obvious for everyone on the bus to my great embarrassment and an army man I was sitting next to, came to my rescue and asked the doctor to look for his own partner, rather than trying to find a perfect fit for me. And there hid myself in the engulfing darkness of the sunset and inconsequential conversation to hide such an embarrassing public confrontation!!

In October 2013, I made a dream backpacking trip to Tawang with my friend. Being two lost females in a strange location, we got a lot of attention and much help. Due to many fortuitous circumstances, we stayed at the house of a Buddhist monpa localite, Richin Tashi Achee who also happened to be our chauffeur for the two days. Their hospitality would put all our ‘Athithi Devo Bhava’ to shame. We were treated to undeserving royalty in their humble homes. On our last day of the two days we spent there, I zealously asked if i could wear Aunty's i.e Rinchin’s wife traditional dress. She was eager to put that on me, and so pleased was she with the way I looked, that she put on me a special chain that she was wearing for our day out that day and commented I looked very much like one of their own tribes women. I got the shock of my life a little later when they informed me that it is made of all precious stones and original tusk, and costs over 20 Lakh rupees. In all their zeal combined with sadness that we were leaving the very next day Rinchin uncle asked me if I would be willing to marry his son, who we all were aware was still in college, which means he is many many years younger to me and not even taking into account the fact that we had never met or spoken to each other and also he was even apprehensive about his father bringing in two tourists home. He further tried to bribe me saying that in the marriage he has to get two such precious chains (similar to that 20L chain) to the bride. While that seemed like an offer I can’t refuse, I politely took this as a show of their love with a sheepish smile and no comments look!!!  

In the same trip on a different leg at a place called Mechuka or Menchuka, our ultimate destination of the biking trip, we were enjoying a sumptuous dinner and most of my fellow traveler were in a moment of bliss in a partially inebriated state. Cmoi after his story on how they found the Mithun meat, turned to me and said ‘Priya, you know, you are very beautiful” There was a pregnant pause. I said a blushing thank you for the compliment. He continued ‘But I have a girlfriend, and you are older than me!!’ I wasn’t particularly sure which one of the two was his problem though!!! This got a lot of people who sat around excited about the conversation. What was even funnier than, in the same table, after dinner and half inebriated state the very next day, he repeated exactly the same lines. Now we had a bigger audience, with most of his friends who knew his girlfriend as well… and who started pulling his leg over the remark. Cmoi swore that he is going to find an appropriate assamese guy for me, since he is already taken ‘Oh ! Poor me ‘… LOL !!!

Even in a country where a marriage is considered as coming together of two families rather than coming together of two people, it was super weird plus very very interesting to see how people may decide on their life partner or even life partners for their sons as impulsive as I would decide to go on a holiday!! And to go on a holiday isn’t generally as life changing as a wedding !!

My fiancé pulls my leg saying I passed up too many opportunities to settle down in the Himalayas. Well that sure seems the case, especially when it came with pretty attractive dowry offers. But I have always believed in destiny, the destiny that brought me exactly what I wanted and needed in a partner in him - A companion for life and a sponsor for my wanderlust :D !!

Be careful what you wish for – Part I (Assam and Arunachal Pradesh)

Even before I read the book ‘The Secret’ this was a concept I truly believed in because more often than not I keep seeing it happening in everyday life.  When I finally read ‘The Secret’, it was recognition of a truth rather than discovery of a new concept. I have come face to face with law of attraction every day but even more often in my travels, in ways that have completely bowled me over. 

Incident 1: My friend and I were on a backpacking trip in Tawang, the lazy next day morning in our hotel, standing just outside our room, my friend suggested we move into a home stay, as the city shuts down very early (by 5PM) and we might be spending a lot of time in the room. Of course we didn’t cross half of India to sit inside a hotel room and watch TV. While what my friend suggested made perfect sense, I wasn’t interested in spending the little time available to look out for a new room. While I was just looking around I saw a beautiful house located lone in a small hillock next to our Hotel, I turned around and told her ‘ If it’s a place like this, we can go’. She looked over my shoulder and said, ‘Nice place, but they don’t seem to have any board on it saying it’s a home stay or guest house’. I turned and looked at her and said “So What?’ She gave me ‘This gal must be mad’ kind of look.

Rinchin uncle in an Army Kitchen

So that day, after breakfast and a walk around the town, Taxi stand, Tawang Monastery, Museum and war memorial later, our good old taxi wala had invited us into his home and on a moment of madness we agreed. We checked out of the hotel, stopped for lunch and then we proceeded to his home. There on our way again we saw a house just like the one we saw in the morning situated alone in a small hillock, surrounded by their own beautiful home garden. Surprise Surprise!!! That was our taxi uncle’s house and that’s the home stay we moved into, and that too for free. The memories of the conversation in the morning looked surreal. There was never a dull moment in our short stay there and the couple became our favorite Buddhist Monpa Hosts.

Incident 2: While planning the same trip I was on the lookout for a stay options in Guwahati in couchsurfing.org. I was willing to try my first couch surfing experience as a guest and was looking for women hosts in the area. I came across the profile of Irani Sakia, who is a wildlife photographer and an adventurer and seemed to be a very popular host. We had a couple of conversations in CS messaging, and she was unable to confirm her availability during our tentative plan dates for Guwahati. I found another host Annjuu Singh who also happened to be a common friend of another traveler I had met through my brother. But Irani’s profile was so amazing, that I expressed my wish to meet her for a cup of Coffee if possible.

One of the coffee Breaks with Escorting Guwahati Friends

On our way back to Demaji, from Mechuka one of the bikers and a fellow traveler from Tamilnadu met with an accident in his bike. A family we met in Mechuka and were on their way back stopped to help him into our rescue vehicle and ensured we found our way around to the local hospital. The Assamese family was also kind enough to offer to escort us from Demaji to Guwahati for safety reasons. So we stopped by on the way for a tea break and were chit chatting with the family. They were actually two families who were family friends and became a very good friend of us. So we were introducing ourselves and guess what I found. One of the Women I met over coffee was Irani Sakia. I had casually mentioned in my email I’d be happy to meet her over coffee and there we were having chai together.

I almost freaked out…What…Irani Sakia… My face detection software hardly works, so no wonder I cannot recognize anyone from a pic.

Incident 3: Every time I travel for a few weeks, my first signs of missing home starts when I start yearning to have curd rice and my friend, Viji was hoping to have nice South Indian Filter coffee.  But we haven’t met one tamil person in the whole time, and of course this seemed like a distant reality that we had to wait to get to Chennai to quench our thirst. But luck was in our favor again, we met Bala da through Pratibu da, who was part of the Assamese family that escorted us to Guwahati. Bala da, was tamil family that had settled in Assam for over 30 years. 

With Bala da

As luck would have it Bala da’s mom played a wonderful host for us and we had a superb filter coffee and a perfect South Indian Dinner (including my favorite curd rice) in Assam.

But it truly was a ‘Be Careful what you wish for’ moment. Thankfully I wished for wonderful things in my life that brought so many wonderful people into my life and ya I sometimes freak myself out. More such moments to follow.

Kindness of Strangers

When I travelled across the breadth and length of the country, I have experienced the love of many strangers for whom I am deeply grateful. They have made a deep impression not only in my travel but also on my outlook about life. The North east India hospitality has been the crowning glory of this lot even when not including our host Rinchin uncles’ hospitality.

There was never once in our trip, when we asked for a way to go somewhere, people just told us where it is, they almost always ensured we got there. Once I was inquiring about restaurant for us to have breakfast, the little boy not only came with us all the way to the restaurant, but made us sit, called the owner and asked him to attend to us and left. Even a police man on duty, came in his cycle and ensured we took the correct turn to our destination. For someone with as bad as geo skills as mine, it was sure more than helpful.



We were travelling from Guwahati to Tezpur in a local bus and a few hours into the journey the bus halted in a bus stop and many alighted. Clueless to where we were, we inquired the conductor about the place and how much more time it may take for us to reach Tezpur. The conductor told us it’s an hour halt and so we may get delayed. Saying so, he picked our backpacks (a 65 L and 45L backpack) and asked us to follow him. He boarded on to another bus, put our backpacks in the luggage area, asked two guys sitting in the front seats to vacate it for us, called the conductor and even bought tickets for us to Tezpur and told the conductor to take care of us. As soon as the bus reached Tezpur, the new conductor again picked our backpacks and got down for the bus, we dutifully followed him. He got hold of a rickshaw puller deposited our bags in the rickshaw and told the rickshaw guy to take us to our hotel.

When we got to the hotel I had been counting on (but didn’t book, lazy me:P) was full for budget rooms but had AC rooms which were costlier than our initial plan. The Hotelier didn’t try to persuade us to take the costlier rooms; he simply referred us to another budget hotel a little further ahead, which he thought was good and safe enough for women travelers like us.  After checking in to the hotel, we rushed to book for the early morning cab service to Tawang. In spite of being the last people to book, just a simple request got us the much coveted front seats in the Sumo.

After an eventful journey in Tawang, we had to travel to Demaji from Tezpur, a 6 hour journey and inquired about the same at the bus stand ticket counter. The ticket issuing person suggested it would be very untime for us to travel in the night and suggested we stay in Tezpur for the day and get the early morning bus. He asked us to wait and brought another man whom he introduced as the person who will be in the ticket counter the next day. The new guy gave us his number and suggested we come 30 – 45 mins before to get the tickets. The next day morning despite our best efforts we were late as usual when we got to the bus stand and the ticketing guy whom we met yesterday immediately recognized us and told us that he was waiting for us and asked us to come inside the office instead of standing in the queue. He also had exact change ready for us even before we handed over the money and had reserved the front seat tickets for us. He asked us to have tea and wait near the bus until he finishes issuing ticket. After some time he came and helped us deposit our luggage and ensured we sit in the front seat, which is safest for women travelling alone.

What a contrast it is to the many auto and taxi walas who dot the railway station who lose no opportunity to con the new comers to the city.

Most times we didn’t even get to ask their names. None of them expected anything in kind for their kindness. The innumerable invisible helping hands and the hearts of gold that helped two lone women travelers cruise through a holiday in a destination where they neither spoke local language nor had any friends of their own was indeed overwhelming.

The true meaning of ‘Adhithi Devo Bhava’ (Visitor is God) reflected in their attitude in which they greeted us. The God was not we the adhithis but the localities themselves for having shown such kindness to us.

My Monpa Hosts in Tawang

This goes as the craziest thing I have ever done of my list of crazy stuff and like every other crazy thing I had done it turned to be awesome fun and rewarding.



My Monpa Hosts

We were standing around a corner of an obscure road in Tawang and deliberating how to go the tawang monastery and one middle aged man local man came and inquired us about it. He happened to be a cab driver and that was a taxi stand. So after a bit of negotiation on places and rates, we got in. Little did we know that this will change our tawang holiday experience. Our Cabwala Mr.Rinchin Tashi Achee soon became our self-appointed tourist guide, took us through the monastery museum and the two levels of the monastery and explained the local culture and the madhubani paintings in there.


Then Rinchin took us to the war memorial and another round of local gyan. We were deliberating on going with him to the Ptso and Madhuri lake the next day and he casually mentioned that we are welcome to stay at his home and even cook if we want. We thought thought though and then packed our bags, checked out and left with him. WE LEFT WITH SOMEONE WE MET LIKE A COUPLE OF HOURS BACK: p

Viji got a bit nervous after getting into the cab not sure what was waiting for us. I told her it’s too late to think about it, let’s handle whatever comes our way….Surprise surprise…a beautiful farm house in a little hillock just below Tawang in Khimney Village awaited us. It just looked like the home stay that we wished we got and were deliberating in the morning…talk about dreams do come true.

Rinchin Uncle (yah…) even paid for our lunch on the way and refused to let me pay for the fuel refill as well or for any of the additional grocery that we bought on the way for us. We were lovingly greeted with tea by his wife, and his daughter who lived a block away and two cute dog. After a little friendly banter, Rinchin Uncle took us to the Khminey Monastery by walk and we explored monastery with a staunch Buddhist, saw Lamas in their dance practice, took pictures with them, met their Guruji who they believe to be an incarnation and got his blessings and even had tea with him.
We were greeted with a sumptuous dinner and even given warm water and a tub to wash to our hands inside their kitchen which was kept with a chulha stove and were asked to watch TV with warm blankets. They sternly refused my offer to help with washing utensils.

Next day early morning we got up to go to the Ptso and Madhuri Lake. Little did we know Aunty got up as early as 3:30AM to cook the breakfast and lunch for us as nothing is available on the way. Aunty was surely love personified in more ways than I can count. Aunty had the picnic basket ready with tea in a flask, warm water in another, roti, subji and anda.

Madhuri Lake, Tawang, Arunachal Pradesh

I was given the preferred front seat and there we set crossing 5 mountains, several breathtaking views, and numerous army outposts. Our first stop was this breath taking Ptso Lake and what a beauty it was. We were spellbound by the beauty of this place and we were quite speechless. After some photo sessions and oh my god!!! Moments. The route was full of several other beautiful lakes on the way, but we hardly saw any tourist vehicle.

A few hours drive later came what we could have never been prepared to see, the Madhuri lake. We learnt later Koyla movie was shot here and the lake was indeed named after Madhiri Dixit.

It was quite a family picnic lunch at least another 3 hours was spent strolling around the lake with no sense of time. We were told china was probably two hours away.

We set off to another small monastery nearby, met the Guruji, got his blessings and tried some experimental photography and then set on our way back and bid adieu to the beautiful Madhuri lake.
It was the last day in tawang…our Sumos have been booked for the next day, backpacks packed, our last dinner with this lovely couple who hosted us during these two days and treated us like family. We knew what a beautiful experience the leap of faith on a stranger had brought us… we felt blessed, grateful and for some reason uncle and aunty felt the same way about hosting us.

I wanted to try out Aunty traditional monpa dress and she not only gladly gave me one from the rack but also put on my neck a special necklace that she was wearing which was reportedly …hold your breath …20 Lakhs cos of the heavy precious stones and the tusker. My travel partner  for the trip wore the a monpa dress as well and we took turns taking snaps with each other. They were so happy to see me in my traditional dress and said I looked so beautiful in that dress and looked just like a localite from arunachal and it would be difficult for anyone to believe that I was from south. They asked us to send the snaps so that they could put a huge framed one of mine in the traditional dress in there. Uncle suddenly said I wish I marry his son and come and be with them forever… (OMG!!! I wasn’t prepared for that!!! That poor boy was still in college and I had fished grad school ages back :P) but they didn’t seem to care for any logical reasoning then: P

Rinchin uncle has asked me to plan a longer stay in tawang next time around and has already listed out all the places that he has to show me next time around.

Rinchin uncle repeatedly said it was destiny that we met in taxi stand on that day and said if they had done anything wrong in the food or driving or in taking care of us that he apologizes for the same. In my broken hindi I told him that our greatest blessing in tawang was to have met them rather than the Guruji or seen those wonderful places.

I didn’t know if I deserved to get so much love from this couple but then I realized it’s just that they are so full of love that it would have been impossible for them to act in any other way. Tawang, Rinchin uncle and Tsongee Aunty…We love you and miss you and of course we’d be back 