The Decent Proposals

A young, solo and single women (that too a pretty woman) traveler encounters many interesting experiences, even in India. I’ve had quite a few of them and some of them lead to indirect and sometimes even direct proposals. Since I’m giving up my single status soon…I thought it would be appropriate to recount some of these interesting proposals.

Cycling in the himalayas

It was in Himachal in April 2012, where I was riding my cycle up the ghat roads of himachal towards Jalori pass and one of those many moments to catch a breath and also to catch that breath taking moment, I stopped by. Put the cycle against the mountain face and settled down sipping water, and looking at the picturesque scene around me. A local himachali old guy soon joined me, intrigued by my attire with knee pads, helmets and mountain cycle, he started inquiring about me things like, where I was from, what I was doing there, what I do for living, what my next destinations is. He seemed a friendly person and I didn’t have a problem answering any of these questions. Suddenly, questions got a little more personal like, what my age is, and if I was single or married and why I wasn’t married yet etc... What followed next was what totally threw me out of my wits, he asked me if I would like to meet his son, and if we both like each other we can get married in a temple near where we were sitting. He went on to explain that they owned a house and some land, with the intention to lure me into his offer. I later came to know that it is not possible for the outsiders to buy property in himachal and so his owning land and property was indeed a big deal!! He definitely seemed like he might call and ask his son to come over right then!!! I quickly excused myself from the place saying that my camp leader would be looking for me and I have to leave right away. He tried to catch up with me for a while and then let me go, with an invite to tea at his home on the way back.

Relaxing at the basecamp

Same year 2012 in the month of October, I was doing my Basic Mountaineering Course with the Himalayan Mountaineering Institute. After all the sunburn, unkempt and uncombed hair, and not having taken a shower or deo or having not seen my face in a mirror for more than 20 days, I found myself alone in Bakhim. Other mountaineers had either not arrived or busy washing clothes or taking a nap. I found a corner to lie back on the rock and look out at the magnificent Kanchenjunga range. It was a perfectly blissful state, and I was enjoying my moment of solitude, when the nepali cook showed up asking me, why I was sitting alone. I realized he was in mood of a conversation. I was unwilling to rudely send him away as I felt really grateful for the wonderful job the cooks had done in feeding us for the last 25 days or so, I sat up to talk. We discussed the Himalayas, nepali sherpas, their profession. Somehow the topic suddenly took a turn on how I would manage to sustain my love for the mountains post wedding, and he  suggested I must marry a Nepali and asked if my parents would be okay with that. He went around trying to sell his case by saying how good they are with the mountains, and if I had still not got the message, he left before saying that he is unmarried too and looking for someone. I subtly wished him good luck.

The love of the mountains got a fellow mountaineer and Bengali doctor from my rope to make an attempt as well. He boldly and openly declared to everyone that ‘Priya will marry only someone who loves the mountains as much as she does… and he went about talking how he though a doctor willingly sacrifices his practice for his love for the mountains !! ‘The messaging got obvious for everyone on the bus to my great embarrassment and an army man I was sitting next to, came to my rescue and asked the doctor to look for his own partner, rather than trying to find a perfect fit for me. And there hid myself in the engulfing darkness of the sunset and inconsequential conversation to hide such an embarrassing public confrontation!!

In October 2013, I made a dream backpacking trip to Tawang with my friend. Being two lost females in a strange location, we got a lot of attention and much help. Due to many fortuitous circumstances, we stayed at the house of a Buddhist monpa localite, Richin Tashi Achee who also happened to be our chauffeur for the two days. Their hospitality would put all our ‘Athithi Devo Bhava’ to shame. We were treated to undeserving royalty in their humble homes. On our last day of the two days we spent there, I zealously asked if i could wear Aunty's i.e Rinchin’s wife traditional dress. She was eager to put that on me, and so pleased was she with the way I looked, that she put on me a special chain that she was wearing for our day out that day and commented I looked very much like one of their own tribes women. I got the shock of my life a little later when they informed me that it is made of all precious stones and original tusk, and costs over 20 Lakh rupees. In all their zeal combined with sadness that we were leaving the very next day Rinchin uncle asked me if I would be willing to marry his son, who we all were aware was still in college, which means he is many many years younger to me and not even taking into account the fact that we had never met or spoken to each other and also he was even apprehensive about his father bringing in two tourists home. He further tried to bribe me saying that in the marriage he has to get two such precious chains (similar to that 20L chain) to the bride. While that seemed like an offer I can’t refuse, I politely took this as a show of their love with a sheepish smile and no comments look!!!  

In the same trip on a different leg at a place called Mechuka or Menchuka, our ultimate destination of the biking trip, we were enjoying a sumptuous dinner and most of my fellow traveler were in a moment of bliss in a partially inebriated state. Cmoi after his story on how they found the Mithun meat, turned to me and said ‘Priya, you know, you are very beautiful” There was a pregnant pause. I said a blushing thank you for the compliment. He continued ‘But I have a girlfriend, and you are older than me!!’ I wasn’t particularly sure which one of the two was his problem though!!! This got a lot of people who sat around excited about the conversation. What was even funnier than, in the same table, after dinner and half inebriated state the very next day, he repeated exactly the same lines. Now we had a bigger audience, with most of his friends who knew his girlfriend as well… and who started pulling his leg over the remark. Cmoi swore that he is going to find an appropriate assamese guy for me, since he is already taken ‘Oh ! Poor me ‘… LOL !!!

Even in a country where a marriage is considered as coming together of two families rather than coming together of two people, it was super weird plus very very interesting to see how people may decide on their life partner or even life partners for their sons as impulsive as I would decide to go on a holiday!! And to go on a holiday isn’t generally as life changing as a wedding !!

My fiancé pulls my leg saying I passed up too many opportunities to settle down in the Himalayas. Well that sure seems the case, especially when it came with pretty attractive dowry offers. But I have always believed in destiny, the destiny that brought me exactly what I wanted and needed in a partner in him - A companion for life and a sponsor for my wanderlust :D !!